Love

It's like a bruised twilight
It's like the first star in the sky
It's like a thick, goose-down duvet
It's like the faint shimmer of the nightlight

It's like the sun peeping through the storm
It's like rolling down hills
It's like baking cookies
It's like diving off the high board
It's like making pictures in clouds

It's like holding a snowflake in the palm of your hand
It's like the sizzling air in a lightning storm
It's like the first breath of spring
It's like the tang of a summer night

It's like nothing

And yet, it is Everything.

Parents

I love these guys. They're the best. I dont know where I would be if I didn't have them in my life.

Mom, Dad--you guys are awesome!

Wildflowers

Last summer, our family went on a hiking kick. I am not a big fan of hiking. My friends are always talking about how awesome it is when their boyfriends/husbands take them out on a hike, and to be honest, I think I would cry if my boyfriend asked me to go on a hike (I would try to put it off for as long as possible, but I would probably go if he kept asking me about it for long enough). That being said, I really did have a good time hiking with my family last summer. You get such a feeling of accomplishment when you finish a hike. Who knows, maybe one day I'll actually enjoy going on a hike--stranger things have happened.

Anyway, my point is that there were enjoyable moments on our hikes. One of those moments was getting to see all the wildflowers in bloom along the mountain trails. You would turn a corner and all of a sudden there would be a field just covered in wildflowers. So pretty! It was a writer's dream. So guess what...I have another poem for you guys! This one is for my dad.

Wildflowers

As I walked along

The mountain trail,

The rocks seeming an

Insurmountable barrier,

I stumbled around a

Corner, and before me lay

A glorious field of wildflowers.

They were flowers for which

I had no name, and I

Loved them all the better

For it. They were happy,

Unpretentious little flowers.

The juice of the sun had

Stained them a deep

Golden yellow, and they

Swayed and danced to the

Silent song of the gentle breeze.

Lured by their simple beauty,

I left the troublesome path

And walked among them.

As I wove a path

Through my golden little friends,

Something new caught my eye.

Stout stalks, precariously

Topped with a pine-cone of flower buds,

Stood stolid among the weaving,

Rippling meadow of gold.

These little clusters of blossoming flowers

Were blue, deep blue, the

Blue of the sea where men drown.

As the wind convinced my little gold friends

To sigh and dance merrily,

These little wonders oversaw the

Merriment as steadfastly as

Wise old widows.

My weariness from the long climb

Gone, I stooped to gather wildflowers.

Once the deed was done, I

Looked at my treasures,

Breathed in their heady, earthy scent,

And thought "This is Life."

We Shall Overcome

Ok, I just had to share this video. I don't follow GloZell (although I do think she's funny sometimes), but I saw this video on a friend's Facebook, and I thought it was great. Here's the description for the video:

I live in California. But I am doing a show named Dr. Fubalous in UTAH. I have been talking about the mask I have to wear for the show and the places I have been in Utah.(Just type in Dr. Fubalous to see all the videos)

However I have been getting some messages on how bad Utah is and this letter I just had to read. I have had nothing but fun and good time in Utah. With some wonderful people who happen to be Mormon.Thanks
I am getting so many letters about Utah and the people there. I can only go by what I feel and how I am treated. I had a great time with some wonderful people.

Now, GloZell does not know ANYTHING about the LDS church--this is very clear throughout the video. But I do appreciate how, even though she doesn't know or understand all of our beliefs, she still thinks we are cool people. Which we are so...

Audio books

I use my car a lot. I remember, once upon a time, when I was terrified to get my driver's licence because that surely I was destined to die in a fiery crash in the middle of the freeway. But now, I cannot imagine life without my little car. Most of the time, I'm driving in the wee hours of the morning (at least that's what it feels like), and I do not do well in the mornings. Sometimes, it's truly a miracle that I'm awake enough to make it to work.

So now I have a problem: I have to work in the mornings because of my school schedule, but I would also prefer not to die in a fiery crash on the freeway because I fell asleep at the wheel. I tried for a while to just blast my "party music," but that wasn't cutting it. Then I started listening to the news on the radio. Aha! Stimulating and informative. But unless there was a gripping news emergency, it just couldn't keep me from yawning more and more. Then, randomly, I decided to start listening to audio books.

Ding, ding, ding! We have a winner. Let me just say that audio books are totally awesome--if you have a good reader. It's entertaining, and it's a great way to experience books, especially if you're like me and you drive a lot, but don't have a lot of time to just sit and read. Funny story: today I went and picked up two audio books that I have been for for a while. I was so unbelievably excited to get back in the car! I am such a nerd.

So anyway, audio books are awesome! You should try them sometime.

21

I'm 21 today! That's so exciting. Well, I'm excited about it.

So far it's been a good day, good week actually. On Saturday, we went to see War Horse (one of the most incredible movies I've seen in a long time. I love, love, love this story--I've seen the play, read the book, and seen the movie, and I cried all three times. If you haven't seen this movie, go see it ASAP) and then we ate at Red Robin. Yesterday, one of my best friends--Maddie--took me to see We Bought a Zoo (another fantastic movie) and then we went to IHOP. Today, I got a wonderful card that was signed by everyone in the office, which made me very happy, and I'm going to Benihana's tonight. This coming Saturday, we'll go up to Hawksridge (our new town-home in Park City) and maybe go sledding (at least that idea was bandied about). Then, the week after that, Heather and I are going to another movie. That's right, I am stretching this birthday out for as long as I can.

Birthdays make me happy. It feels really good to know that people love you.

Hopeless

Why is it that I am such a hopeless romantic? Why is it that I'm so drawn to the Love Story? Why is that--even though I know the couple will be together, no matter how impossible it might seem for them to be together, or how much they might hate each other at first--my heart clenches when the final obstacle in the story just seems to big to be overcome? Why do I--an English Major, for Heaven's sake!--incessantly read about the out-of-place, nerdy, high school senior who falls for the tall, dark haired, deliciously handsome guy with just a hint of a dark side who is so out of her league that it's laughable? Why do I always get chills when he finally whispers "I love you" to her?

There is, of course, an overly-simple and somewhat superficial answer to this: I want to have a Love Story myself. But doesn't everyone want a Love Story? Doesn't everyone wish to find their soul mate, no matter the cost? Surely I can't be alone in this. But there is something else going on. I look at my sisters, and they enjoy a good piece of chick-lit (they ate up the Twilight Saga just as much as practically every other woman in the western world) every once in a while, but they don't devour them like I do.

I once told someone that love stories are my bread and butter. Oh, I love every kind of book--mysteries, the classics, thrillers, historical fiction, and even non-fiction if it's well written. But nothing calls to me like the utterly predictable Love Story. No, I feel like there's a small hole deep inside of me, and I am constantly trying to fill it with these sickly sweet, wispy, fluffy story-lines. I can see you there, as you read this post. You are just sitting there, shaking your head at me and thinking "Well, that's a bit overly dramatic, Ashley." It probably is, but that's how I feel. It's an unsolvable question, a part of me that will just have to be accepted.

On a slightly different, but still related, note: I've found a new song that I'm in love with. Enjoy.

P.S. Merry Christmas and Happy New Years! Sorry I didn't wish everyone happy holidays before now.

P.P.S. As I re-read this post, it sounds kind of depressing. I didn't mean it to be depressing. It's just something I've been musing on lately. I think strangely. Don't worry about it. :)